Every girl at some point in her life has read the story of Romeo and Juliet. The dramatic love story of Romeo and Juliet has every girl pinning for a man who will go to great lengths for her, even to the point of death. The love story of Romeo and Juliet is one that was been told for years but when you really think about their love story and the picture that it portrays, you begin to see their love was not true love but rather infatuation. Infatuation and the idea of a relationship should look like and not a realistic picture.
Hollywood, along with the tale of Romeo and Juliet, have sold women the idea of what a relationship is supposed to look like, but in reality, this picture is far from anything that a guy or a girl could ever achieve. The reason that we love Romeo and Juliet’s love story is because of their undying love for each other. But have you ever thought about the amount of emotion or expectation that was involved int their relationship? High emotion and great expectation is what their relationship was built on and this is not the kind of example that you want to mold your relationship, or future relationship after.
I always feel bad for guys because romance movies and books give girls such high, unrealistic expectations for what a guy should be like and how he should act. Everything about the relationship in movies or books seems perfect and we all know that in the end the couple will end up together. The portrayals of perfect men, dates all planned to perfection, and undying love are what we have been told is what we should look for in a guy. However, this is not the case with real life relationship and not Hollywood written ones.
Life doesn’t work this way. Relationships are far from perfect. Expectations need to be brought down a little. Selfless love should be at the center of a relationship. If you are both striving to be more and more like Christ, then you will want to serve each other, encourage and build one another up. You will look at your expectations of what you think he needs to be (his looks, what kind of job he has, how the relationship will be, ect..) instead of for who he really is.
Having a relationship that is based on expectations is a relationship that has a shaky foundation. Eventually, when the expectations are not met, then the relationship will come crumbling down. You want a relationship built on Christ and then everything else and not the other way around. I know Hollywood and romance stories are the oh-so-perfect-love-story but you can still have an amazing love story without the false expectation.
There Is Only One Guy For You
When Romeo realized that he couldn’t have Juliet, he decided it would be better to commit suicide than to not be allowed to marry the love of his life. The problem with this comes from the idea that there is only one guy in the whole world for you to marry. I don’t know about you but that is a lot of pressure for you to find the perfect guy in the midst of millions and millions of people in the world. Out of all the guys in the world, you are supposed to find THE ONE and then you will find true love.
What Is True Love Then?
True love is not like the kind of love that Romeo and Juliet had for each other. True love takes works, it is overcoming challenges, it is facing life together, it is selfless, and enduring. 1 Corinthians 13, known as the chapter of love, describes what true love is:
“Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.”
True love is not found in just a person but who that person is on the inside; their heart and for their character. All in all, true love is best described as in 1 Corinthians 13. It is the perfect example of the type of love that we need to have in our lives and with our boyfriends or spouses.
Don’t take the tales in a book or plot in a Hollywood movie and try to apply it to your own relationship, or future relationship. It won’t work. In the end, you will only leave feeling discontent because nothing was up to the perfect story line that you had been sold for years. Darling, overcoming the Romeo and Juliet syndrome and seeing a relationship for what it is takes time. No relationship will be perfect but just enjoy the journey.
Remember, all the qualities that selfless love is: patient, kind, humble, full of faith, and suffers long. This is the kind of love story that you want. A love story that follows the example set in 1 Corinthians 13. A love story where Christ is at the center and where both of you are striving to become more and more like Christ each day. This is the kind of love that we should have in our relationships.